Wednesday, September 21, 2011

How Do I Want Them to Remember Me?

If you do recall, I am working hard in my mission towards becoming a better mom for my girls.
And #22 on the list, asks for me to think about how
I want them to remember me. Tough question. There are so many things
 I'd like for my children to be able to honestly say about me when they look back on their childhood.

Here are a few of the highlights from my list:

*I'd like them to be able to say that we had fun. That we did fun things, that we had fun adventures, and that we were rarely bored all fit in that category to me as well.

*I'd like for them to be able to say that I stood up for them. While I realize that my children are not always going to be right and that they will, in fact, sometimes be very wrong, I want them to know that if the occasion were to ever present itself, I would fight tooth and nail for them. I am their biggest fan, and I will ALWAYS be on their side, even if being on their side means steering them in the direction they need to go to be and do better.

*I'd like for them to be able to say that I was well-rounded. By this I mean, I hope my girls grow up feeling that I did a good job balancing work with family life, that they always felt important no matter how many fires I had burning elsewhere, and that they can see and learn from the fact that I have other interests and still make time for my friends while doing all I can to be the best mom I can be.

*I'd like for them to say that I was their teacher. While I don't home school my children, I don't just turn the teacher in my off when I get home. We still read together, play games together, and do homework together. And I make a conscious effort to teach my children daily, whether it's a life lesson or a lesson I think their teachers won't be able to teach them because so much of what they are able to do has to revolve around testing; I want my children to be able to say that they learned something from me.

*I'd like for them to say that I was creative. By this I don't just mean crafty; I also mean that I tried to approach life in a way that was sometimes out of the box. I hope they notice that I try to shake things up sometimes and to make life as fun and interesting for them as I can. Whether it's being creative with our budget to still offer them all that I can or creative with mealtime to make it more appealing, I hope they realize that I worked hard to make their home a memorable, fun, festive play to be.

*I'd like them to say that I taught them the importance of doing for others. Serving others is a huge part of who I am, and while I realize that we all have our own, unique gifts and some feel more led to serve than others, I believe that we should all do our best to help those less fortunate, whether it be someone who literally has less than we do or someone who is hurting or suffering in some other way. I want my children to know from day one that this is important, that is what God intended, and that some of the greatest joy we can find here on Earth comes from this.

*I'd like them to say that I was honest with them. I don't consider my children to be sheltered, and I think that Lee and I do a good job of being honest with our children in terms of our expectations, their gifts, their shortcomings, and everything in between. While I realize that children are only little once and I want to preserve their child-ness as long as possible, I also want them to be aware that the world is full of joy and happiness just as much as it is full of hurt and fear, and it's how we balance the two that makes the difference.

*I'd like them to say that I embraced them for who they are and recognized their gifts. I work very hard to not compare my children. By this I don't just mean to each other, but also to my idea or vision of who I think they should be or who I'd like them to become. I aim to love them AS THEY ARE while also helping them become their best possible selves. For my two girls could not be more different from one another. How I discipline Libby and the kind of child she was is like night and day from Hollyn. So, with baby #2, it's almost like I'm starting from scratch in many ways. And I make a valiant effort to embrace their differences.

*I'd like them to say that I am someone they can respect. I want them to recognize that I have their best interests at heart, and when I correct them or steer them in a different direction, it's only because I want this life to be as wonderful as possible for those I love. I want them to see that I am honest, hard-working, and dedicated to them and that they are at the very heart of my identity.

And, most importantly:

*I'd like them to say whole-heartedly that I love them unconditionally.

What about you? How do YOU want your children (or friends for those of you who aren't at this same place in life) to remember you when they're all grown up and doing their own thing?

And to my mom readers, if you're still interested in signing up to be featured in my upcoming I AM THAT MOM week, please let me know. I still have three available spots.
 And, in case you're wondering, here are my I Am That Mom posts from last year:

Enjoy your trip down memory lane.

Happy Wednesday to you and you and you.

1 comment:

  1. This is such a sweet list of things for your girls to remember about you...beautifully illustrates how intentionally you love them! Thanks for sharing!


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