Have I Really Become THAT Mom?

I saw this today while wasting time on Pinterest. 

(Don't judge; you do it too.)

And it kinda scared me. 

I mean, what I am I REALLY saying to my kids? 

What are they learning from me? 

Sometimes I feel like I spend so much time doing daily tasks (I mean, MUST they really eat every single day? And when is someone finally going to invent clothes that repel dirt and boogies and germs? Come on, already. You're killing me here with all this laundry.) that I miss out on ENJOYING time with my family. 

What if they ONLY remember the worst version of me? 

You know, the mom who is frazzled and half crazy after three weeks of trying to teach the multiplication tables to my second grader and who is tired of scraping Play-Doh out of the carpet?

 I will seriously cry. 

There's no way they'll want to be best friends later in life with THAT mom. 

They won't want to hang out at our house in high school 

and will NEVER come home to visit when they go away to college. 

Great, I've totally dropped the ball on this whole motherhood thing, 

and my kids aren't even in middle school yet. 

THAT mom says things like this: 

-Eat your broccoli. 

-No.

-Don't talk back; I just need you to say yes ma'm.

-No.

-If you did indeed brush your teeth, then we need to review what that actually looks like, because I'm looking at some pretty dirty teeth here, kiddo. 

-No.

-Backyardigans? Again? Well, at least it's not Caillou.
-No.

-4x7=28. Yes, I'm sure. And yes, you will need to know this because one day your phone battery will be dead, and you won't be able to use your calculator. 

I don't want to be THAT mom. 

That mom is not fun. 

That mom needs lots of Jesus. 

So let's just pretend for a second that my house cleaned itself, we had a live-in maid who also happens to be a gourmet chef, and I magically was gifted with the ability to eat whatever I want and never gain an ounce, thus giving me a whole lot more times on my hands to be the mom I WANT to be, the one is put together and poised and has more patience in her pinky toe than I usually feel like I have in my whole body. 

That mom bakes cookies and lets her kids finger paint every day after school.

She never raises her voice and is actually good at teaching her kids how to appropriately incorporate their obscure vocabulary words into sentences.

And while part of me kinda hates her, the other part of me kinda wants to be her. 

So, for the sake of me not feeling like a t-total failure as a mom today, let's pretend I'm THAT mom for a second. 

Here are things I'd want my kids to hear me say: 

-I am proud of you. 

-You are awesome just the way God made you. 

-It's okay to fail at something. 

-Please pick good friends and learn early to ignore the mean girls; there will always be mean girls to ignore. Pray for them, but don't let them ruin your day. 

-Every girl has something she can't stand about herself. The sooner you embrace this something and learn to make the most of it, the happier you'll be. 

-No matter what you do, I will always, always, always love the heck out of you. 

-You need Jesus. When things are good, bad, or indifferent, you need Jesus. Don't wait for things to get bad to turn to Him or you'll miss out on so very much. 

-Yes. Yes. Yes. 

-Eat your broccoli....and your cookies. 

While I realize that I'll never fully be THAT mom, I would like to find more of balance in my life. 

Cool and collected mom is in me somewhere...she's just hiding under the pile of laundry that's been sitting on the couch for three...ummm make that four days. 

I want to be more conscious of the words that come out of my mouth. 

I want my kids to remember me as the mom who says more than just, "No," and, "Not right now."

And I do in fact need more Jesus....every. single. day.