Tuesday, April 17, 2012

I Thought We'd Be Home in an Hour

So the other day I talked about how awesome March was and told April that if it wanted to top last month, it had some serious work to do. Apparently, April could care less about being better than last month and instead took my challenge and threw it back in my face.
 April, we are so not friends. 

Here's the skinny: 

Saturday afternoon I came home after being gone for the day working on some things for an upcoming Christian retreat I'll be working. And by the time I got home, Hollyn's breathing was concerning to say the least. Lots of constant, dry coughing followed by short, shallow breathing. This is one of my least favorite parts of being a Mom, the whole 'my baby is sick but I'm not sure how sick'. Is she 'emergency room sick' or 'lay low and wait it out sick' or 'wait until tomorrow and try to find a clinic that's open on Sundays' sick? We went to bed in my bed together (which we NEVER do) at about 8:30. A few hours and lots of non-sleeping later, Lee and I decided that she clearly wasn't getting better and needed to go to the emergency room. So I headed out with her while Lee stayed home with Libby. Note: Barring fire or natural disaster, we DO NOT wake up Libby. Getting her to go to sleep is all but an act of Congress, so the thought of waking her up is just non optional. Plus, I was SURE that we'd go to the ER, they'd all but laugh at me because this clearly was NOT an emergency, give us a breathing treatment, and we'd be home in an hour or so. 

Yeah, so I was wrong.

After four and half hours in the ER, three failed IV attempts, one shot in the hip, two oral doses of medicine, and a blood drawing, Hollyn was admitted to our local hospital and diagnosed with bronchialitis, not to be confused with bronchitis. (Actually, the differences are very minute-- basically both are scary and the risks of pneumonia are lingering close by with both.)

I've been a mom for seven and a half years, and thankfully, until now I've never had a child spend the night in the hospital, other than the few short days we spent there following each of their births. After spending the past three days and three nights there with Hollyn, let me just say that I don't think I've ever felt more like a mom than I did while hunkered down with Hollyn in the hospital bed. 

There is just something so humbling about watching your child struggle to breathe. It's hard and scary and exhausting. But the whole time I found comfort in the fact that it could be so, so, so much worse. 

And although our night in the oxygen tent felt like what I'd imagine it would be like to sleep outside in the Amazon when there's a cool breeze in the air, overall I am just thankful for good doctors and modern medicine and a very helpful big sister and one cooperative baby girl. And words like 'oxygen level' and 'raised white blood cells' and 'croup tent' are words I'd like to permanently remove from my vocabulary.

But if you want to make me feel loved and show me how much you care, I've realized that it takes nothing more than being concerned about my kiddo to do just that. My friends completely rose to the occasion, and I am one loved mom with one very loved little girl, who happens to be very, very, very excited to be home.....even if 'home' for the next few days will consist of breathing treatments, watching her like a hawk, and camping out inside. We are so blessed and so thankful for a quick recovery for our little one. And to all those moms out there who are living in and out of hospital rooms with their little ones, my heart goes out to you now like it never has before.

Here's hoping your April is showing my April who's boss. 


  1. i'm so glad y'all are home...your pics on instagram reminded me of our trip to the hospital with milo. we didn't stay overnight, but even just being there for a day is a good reminder of how hard it is being a mama.

    i'm glad she's okay! i wish kids could just tell us how sick they are---it would save us a lot of "is she this sick? is she okay? can we wait it out?" blah blah blah. i do that all too often.

  2. Aww how scary! I have a daughter with a compressed trachea, (Part of her heart is naturally pressing against it) So the croupy cough is a normal thing for us, but any time we are sick I am always worried that it will be a trip to the ER thing. Whatever cold that might be going around, it's twice as bad for her.
    I always say, gut instincts are always better to go on. Better safe than sorry, and I'd rather the ER docs say Oh no she's fine and send me home than ignore it, and find out something must worse! :)

    Hope your LO is feeling much better!

  3. Bless her heart (and yours too!)! Hope she continues to do well and recovers quickly. Praying for y'all!

  4. oh, that must have been such a tough time. Thank goodness Hollyn is better! Prayers for you guys!

  5. So stressful. I'm thankful to hear she is back to healthy!

  6. As I said on Twitter, we had the same thing with Kimber, but her's ended up being pnuemonia. And we went through the same dilemma... ER sick or clinic sick? What made me scared too is that my husband has been a paramedic for 10 years and I worked in pediatrics for 5 years and we still couldn't make a rash decision! I'm so happy that H is much better and y'all are home! And I LOVED how cute her hair was despite being couped up!!!


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