Shake it off.

Oh, I love this girl.

Look at her-- she just radiates fun and adventure and creativity. 

She has such a fun style, and her independence is growing a little more each and every day. 

Fourth grade and ten-- they've been whole new worlds for us. 

For you see, my girl is growing up. 

We've seeing in all avenues of her life-- 

her abilities, her thinking, her friends--

everything is changing. 

And change can be hard sometimes. 

But, I've said it 100 times before, and I'll say it again:

this girl was made for something special. 

There is only one Libby. 

And I'm so glad she's mine. 

We've hit the Summer wall.

At this point, we're about four weeks into Summer. 

And it's happened--

we've hit the Summer wall. 

The newness has worn off. 

We're no longer waking up ready to go at 6:30 in the AM. 

We're watching too much TV because it's hotter than the sun and the mosquitoes are ready to turn us into a virtual buffet the minute we step outside. 

And this mom has had enough. 

With Dad teaching Summer school this summer, I knew this would happen. 

The kids get bored, which I hate. 

We've read just about everything there is to read at the library. 

We've played Yahtzee so many times that I'm one step away from hearing dice rolling in my dreams. 

We've water-colored 'til our little fingers look like prunes and there is no more paper to be found. 

We've played pretend and dress up. 

We're all Candy Land and puzzles and Barbie-d out. 

We've cleaned and braided and colored. 

And we still have about seven weeks to go. 

Ideas? 

Thoughts? 

Anything? 

Help a mom out. 

The beach is different with kids.

The beach is different with kids. 

It's as simple and complicated as that. 

No more closing my eyes and drifting away into a sweet, sunburn slumber. 

No more floating on a rift and staring up at the sun until I am in a sun and sand daze.

No more throwing a beach towel and a good book in a bag and heading out. 

Nope, nope, nope. 

Now I roll out with no less that fifty pounds o' goodies. 

Things like sunscreen with ALL the SPF, enough snacks to feed a small army, and every beach toy known to man find their way into my beach bag. 

My eyes are on overdrive-- constantly watching. 

Constantly counting kiddos. 

Constantly reapplying all the sunscreen to all their many, many parts. 

The beach is still fun. 

It's still relaxing. 

But these days, my joy comes from watching them rather than from my own time spent sunning. 

Seeing Hollyn sit in the water, little green floaties bobbing up and down, up and down brings a smile to face. 

And watching Libby find and treasure every. single. shell.--- that's pure joy, people. 

But the greatest beach joy these days? 

Oh, that's easy---

watching my girls love the heck out of it the same way I do. 

Takes the cake with every splashing wave. 

Tiny dancers unite.

You know how some mothers are emotional about things like graduation or birthdays 

or the last days of schools? 

Well, I'm the mom who is emotional about dance recital. 

There is just something so special about watching my girls perform. 

It slays me to see them so grown up and so independent. 

I'm not holding their little chubby hands or standing close by. 

They don't need me to be; they've got this. 

That time they are on stage, watching them up there looking so confident, it does something to my heart. 

It's one of my finest mom moments. 

Not because they're doing anything that a million other little girls around the world are doing this time of year.....

....simply because they're mine. 

And I love them as big as the sky, ripped tights, tap shoes (or no tap shoes-- way to pull that one off, Hollyn), and glitter eye shadow aside.

The Mom I Hope They See

Oh, my girls. 

How dearly I love them. 

I've been thinking a lot lately about my role as their mom. 

What kind of mom do I want to be? 

What are things I want them to remember about me? 

What do I hope they ingrain deep in their memories, and what do I hope they slowly forget? 

And while I'm still (and will forever be) a work in progress, here are some things I hope they see:

*I HOPE THEY SEE ME LOVING OTHERS WELL. 

Serving others, meeting their needs, filling in the gaps. I hope they see me reaching out to help those in need both globally and locally. Listening, protecting, encouraging others-- being a good friend on a daily basis.  I hope they realize that this is important and have a desire to serve others even when it's not necessarily the easiest or most fun or most convenient thing they will ever do. 

*I HOPE THEY SEE ME BEING HONEST. 

I want to be the kind of mom who says the same things behind closed doors and out in the world. I hope they see me sticking to my convictions regardless of the circumstances. I hope they know that I mean what I say and say what I mean. 

*I HOPE THEY SEE ME FAIL. 

We all fail sometimes. It's part of life. But, how we handle failure is what separates us. I hope my girls see me fail with humility and a good attitude. I hope they see me laugh at myself and try again. I hope they see me rely on Jesus when things get hard....which they will...often. 

*I HOPE THEY SEE ME LOVE JESUS.

I hope they leave our home one day knowing that time with Jesus is crucial. It doesn't just happen. We have to make it a priority and stick to it. We have to realize that it's a NEED, not just something nice we sometimes do. I want them to know that the nearer they draw to Him, the happier and more fulfilled they will be, regardless of the circumstances. 

*I HOPE THEY SEE ME PERSEVERE. 

Some things in life are worth fighting for. They are worth losing sleep for. They are worth crying over. They are worth hanging in there for even when things are anything but fun. I hope my girls can tell the difference between what is worth fighting for and what they should let go of. I hope they can say that I never gave up when it really mattered. 

*I HOPE THEY SEE ME HAVING FUN.

There are so many things I don't do well. I get frustrated and mad, I'm terrible at waking up on time, and sometimes cereal for dinner is just the best I can do. BUT, I do fun well. And I hope they notice. 

What do YOU hope your kiddos see in you? 

Do tell. 

And I hope you're having a great week. 

It's been beautiful here lately-- Mississippi generally tends to struggle when it comes to the changing of the seasons, meaning we usually get about two good days of spring before we plunge face first into summer. I've been trying to make the most of it while it lasts. How are YOU gearing up for summer? Working on our summer bucket list and gearing up for all of the goodness that the end of the school year tends to bring with it. 

Happy Thursday to you and you and you!

It's Official- I'm Losing My Mind

***If you've been around here for a while, you'll notice that I'm recycling this picture. 

I have bigger problems these days than re-using a pic in a blog post, so don't judge me too harshly, please. ***

I think I have officially lost my mind. 

Between the fundraisers and the fundraisers and the fundraisers and the paperwork and the house to clean and the dinners to cook and the clothes to wash and the....well, you get the idea, I think I've officially reached the 'I can't take on anything else right now' point in the adoption process. 

Now don't get my wrong, I am beyond thankful for the fundraising. Really, I can't even begin to put into words just how thankful I am. I'm also thankful for my kids and home and the fact that we have food to eat. All of these things that I'm busy doing are good things. There are just a lot of them right now. 

And I like my plate full. 

In fact, I can honestly say that I am happiest when I have about four fires burning at once. 

However, this is a whole lot of fires...and there's only one me. 

And yesterday was the icing on the stacked too high these days cake. 

I went to the car pool line, crying three year old in tow. 

I sat in the carpool for thirty minutes because Libby claims that all of the 'good moms' are parked near the front. I'm trying to be a good mom here, folks. So, I sit and sit and sit, doing my best to comfort the crying three year in the backseat who has now learned how to unbuckle herself and constantly tries to get out of her seat. So not fun. Anyway, I finally making it around to the front of the line, and I don't see Libby. 

*Insert moment of panic here.*

The teacher on duty notices that Libby isn't getting in my car and goes to look for her. 

She then comes back and politely reminds me that it was Tuesday. 

And Libby rides the bus to children's church choir on Tuesdays. 

She's done this for over a month. 

And I totally forgot. 

I sat in the car pool line for nothing. 

And there are few things in the world I hate more than the carpool line. 

At least I didn't forget to pick her up all together, right? 

Oh, the things we do for our kids, whether they are home or half way across the world. 

So, if you need me anytime soon, just know that I'm here, still in my jammers, working harder than I ever did when I was actually getting a paycheck for my work, and trying to keep my head above water. 

God never said the good things would be easy. 

But my girl is worth every late night, every trip to the post office, every minute spent at the computer, every fundraising attempt, and every pound of candy corn that I consume in the process. 

It's My Job

My girl is growing up. 

There's simply no stopping it. 

The milestones these days are getting bigger and bigger. 

I swear that just yesterday she was saying her first word (it was 'hey', by the way. So very fitting for those of you who know my little social butterfly.), and now she's riding a bike...alone...down the street....with no training wheels. 

My heart can hardly take it. 

And as she's stating a new year of  school, I worry.

Worrying is my job, you know. 

It's in the Motherhood Handbook. 

I checked. 

Will she make friends? 

Will she understand multiplication? 

Will I ever understand multiplication?

Will she like her teachers?

Will she grow her love for learning this year?

Will she have fun? 

What if this is the year she decides she doesn't like school? 

What if she starts to dread going? 

What if she gets bullied? 

I think this is something that keeps every mother up at night.

The truth is, kids can be mean. 

And with all the cell phones and social communication, bullying has only gotten worse.

And I'm sure that the little we've experienced so far in elementary school is nothing compared to what awaits in middle school and high school. 

And words hurt. 

They stick to you and stay with you. 

I can still remember the mean things kids said to me growing up. 

There is a high possibility that this is one of the reasons that I hate my hair to this very day.

Bullying is real. 

It's also a real problem that affects kids in every school in our country.  

And this week, I'm partnering with Sevenly to do something about it. 

After raising $15,000 last week to help provide clean water to the people of Ethiopia, this week, Sevenly is teaming up with Stand for the Silent to help protect children being bullied in school. 

Through educating students about the real dangers associated with bullying, they hope to help students develop an empathetic awareness through education and understanding. 

And as a mom, I could not more fully support this campaign. 

(I also can not possibly love this shirt any more than I already do.)

Head on over to Sevenly to read more about what they're doing to combat bullying. 

And if you need me, I'll be here....trying to stop time and buying a brick to put on Libby's head. 

No more growing at our house...at least not for a while...my mama heart can't handle it.

Have I Really Become THAT Mom?

I saw this today while wasting time on Pinterest. 

(Don't judge; you do it too.)

And it kinda scared me. 

I mean, what I am I REALLY saying to my kids? 

What are they learning from me? 

Sometimes I feel like I spend so much time doing daily tasks (I mean, MUST they really eat every single day? And when is someone finally going to invent clothes that repel dirt and boogies and germs? Come on, already. You're killing me here with all this laundry.) that I miss out on ENJOYING time with my family. 

What if they ONLY remember the worst version of me? 

You know, the mom who is frazzled and half crazy after three weeks of trying to teach the multiplication tables to my second grader and who is tired of scraping Play-Doh out of the carpet?

 I will seriously cry. 

There's no way they'll want to be best friends later in life with THAT mom. 

They won't want to hang out at our house in high school 

and will NEVER come home to visit when they go away to college. 

Great, I've totally dropped the ball on this whole motherhood thing, 

and my kids aren't even in middle school yet. 

THAT mom says things like this: 

-Eat your broccoli. 

-No.

-Don't talk back; I just need you to say yes ma'm.

-No.

-If you did indeed brush your teeth, then we need to review what that actually looks like, because I'm looking at some pretty dirty teeth here, kiddo. 

-No.

-Backyardigans? Again? Well, at least it's not Caillou.
-No.

-4x7=28. Yes, I'm sure. And yes, you will need to know this because one day your phone battery will be dead, and you won't be able to use your calculator. 

I don't want to be THAT mom. 

That mom is not fun. 

That mom needs lots of Jesus. 

So let's just pretend for a second that my house cleaned itself, we had a live-in maid who also happens to be a gourmet chef, and I magically was gifted with the ability to eat whatever I want and never gain an ounce, thus giving me a whole lot more times on my hands to be the mom I WANT to be, the one is put together and poised and has more patience in her pinky toe than I usually feel like I have in my whole body. 

That mom bakes cookies and lets her kids finger paint every day after school.

She never raises her voice and is actually good at teaching her kids how to appropriately incorporate their obscure vocabulary words into sentences.

And while part of me kinda hates her, the other part of me kinda wants to be her. 

So, for the sake of me not feeling like a t-total failure as a mom today, let's pretend I'm THAT mom for a second. 

Here are things I'd want my kids to hear me say: 

-I am proud of you. 

-You are awesome just the way God made you. 

-It's okay to fail at something. 

-Please pick good friends and learn early to ignore the mean girls; there will always be mean girls to ignore. Pray for them, but don't let them ruin your day. 

-Every girl has something she can't stand about herself. The sooner you embrace this something and learn to make the most of it, the happier you'll be. 

-No matter what you do, I will always, always, always love the heck out of you. 

-You need Jesus. When things are good, bad, or indifferent, you need Jesus. Don't wait for things to get bad to turn to Him or you'll miss out on so very much. 

-Yes. Yes. Yes. 

-Eat your broccoli....and your cookies. 

While I realize that I'll never fully be THAT mom, I would like to find more of balance in my life. 

Cool and collected mom is in me somewhere...she's just hiding under the pile of laundry that's been sitting on the couch for three...ummm make that four days. 

I want to be more conscious of the words that come out of my mouth. 

I want my kids to remember me as the mom who says more than just, "No," and, "Not right now."

And I do in fact need more Jesus....every. single. day. 

Mother's Day: What I Want This Year

This Mother's Day I want to be informed. 

I want to know more about other mothers in this world. 

I want to know how I can best instill in my girls a desire to serve God and others. 

I want to teach them what it means to give selflessly. 

I want to know how I can best make a difference in the lives of others. 

I want to better understand what it means to be in need. 

I want to know how my marriage can be the best version of what it is. 

I want to learn how to best display grace for my kiddos. 

I want to be a better mother in every possible way. 

Here are some places I have started and hope to soon start in terms of getting and doing better: 

Half the Sky

A Framework for Understanding Poverty

When Helping Hurts

Teaching with Poverty in Mind

Grace Based Parenting 

Global Girlfriends

Beyond Ordinary 

No Greater Love

Rescueing Hope

One Million Arrows

The older I get, the more I realize that motherhood is the most important job I will ever do. 

And that's something worth taking seriously. 

What is one way YOU hope to grow as a mother this year? 

Are there any resources you'd recommend? 

Happy early Mother's Day to all of the mothers out there who are giving their all each and every day to raise up givers and doers and servers. 

The Trouble with Blogging

There are so many things to love about blogging. 

There are also things that cause me to make faces like this and say things like SERIOUSLY!?! and YOU'VE GOT TO BE KIDDING!

Like I've said before, I blog for three reasons:

-to document life for my kiddos

-to advocate for things I'm passionate about

-to form relationships and connect with others

Here's where the trouble comes into play. 

Obviously when we write blog posts, we put our best foot forward. 

We only take pictures of the clean parts of our house.

We choose not to use the unflattering pictures (this post is obviously not an example of this).

We leave out the details about yelling at our kiddos, have laundry stacked up for days, and needing to vacuum...desperately. 

We make our homes, our kiddos, and our marriages seem as appealing as possible. 

Not only is this an unrealistic picture of our lives, but it's downright dangerous. 

I hate to think of some mom out there struggling to take a shower today and crying over her cold coffee, thinking to herself, "Why I can't be as organized as so and so?" 

Or, "If only my house/clothes/kids were as cute as hers".

Danger. Danger. Danger. 

There is also the risk of utter disappointment. 

Take, for example, this scenario: 

Girl reads blog. 

Girl comes to love blogger. 

Girl relates to her, understands her, and feels she is speaking her language. 

Girl comes to view said blogger as a friend of sorts. 

Girl doesn't know everything about blogger's life and beliefs, but fills in the unknowns as she chooses, assuming that because they have the same views on this and this and this, that they must have the same views on other important things as well. 

Then one day, said blogger Girl so admires lays it all out there: she believes in God but not really. She acknowledges He exists but doesn't chose to live her life according to His word or moral standards. 

Girls watches as the bubble she's been living in blows up in her face. 

This happened to me recently. 

I am that Girl...the one who filled in the blanks about one of her favorite blogger's life and was recently utterly disappointed. 

It's not that I don't believe in freedom of religion. 

It's not that I don't believe that people who aren't Christians can't be awesome friends, moms, wives, and people. 

What bothers me about this blogger and her recent admissions that her kids should define themselves based on what they do and how they act and how she sees them rather than based on how God made them and His guidelines for their life is that this sets the stage for all of these people who so admire her to simply believe her rather than deciding for themselves. 

When we put a blogger or a speaker or an actress or a political figure in a larger than life bubble is that we tend to take the HUMAN out of them, so to speak. 

We tend to think that their values and thoughts and opinions somehow mean more than others. 

We somehow often believe that because these people are successful in some area of life they must know something we don't. 

And then when our bubble we've put them in bursts, we are terribly disappointed. 

I looked up to this blogger. 

I admired her. 

She's a seemingly great mom. 

She's fun. 

And there's no denying her talent. 

But I totally disagree with her stance on this. 

While I want my girls to recognize their own strengths, gifts,and talents, I also want them to recognize who GAVE them those strengths, gifts, and talents. 

I want them to thank God and realize He is a part of every aspect of their lives. 

Without Him, they would not exist; without Him, we all are nothing. 

I'm not saying that simply because I disagree with her that she's no longer a great mom, or lots of fun, or very talented. 

I'm simply saying there's danger in bubbles. 

*For the record, I realize that I failed to mention the name of the blogger who recently burst my bubble. It wasn't on accident. I'm not trying to speak negatively of her blog. It is still just as beautiful and thought provoking and well written as it was before I came to this realization. She just serves as one example of how I believe that we are only to care about what God thinks and says; those who are successful DON'T have all the answers or know some grand life secret we aren't aware of....no matter how adorable their blogs are.*

Summer Summer Summer

So I know these two little girls.....

...and they are so very ready for summer. 

It's coming; in fact, it will be here before we know it. 

And we're working on our list. 

In case you missed it, I LOVE LISTS. 

Basically, they're my favorite. 

I just find that I am so much more productive with a list...and checking things off isn't bad either. 

Here's what's on our list so far: 

-water balloon fight

-pretend camping trip

-roast marshmallows

-teach Libby the times tables (1-10)

-help Hollyn FINALLY master her colors (we're struggling over here, people)

-read Anne of Green Gables with Libby

-make trees from paper bags

-have a fingerprint adventure

-learn a Bible verse a week as a family

-make chocolate chip pancakes (and enjoy every bite)

-go on a picnic

-blow bubbles

-paint in the bathtub

-go swimming

-have a playdate

-make pet rocks

-make noodle necklaces

It's growing every day. 

What's on YOUR summer to-do list? 

Got any awesome ideas? 

I'd love to hear about them....

And come on, summer! 

We're waiting on you.....

Cooler Than Being a Rockstar

Nose wiper.

Hair fixer.

Homework helper. 

Clothes washer.

Story teller.

Potty trainer.

Lunch packer.

Medicine giver.

Boo boo kisser.

Alphabet singer. 

Farm noise maker. 

Bath tub runner. 

Diaper changer. 

Band-aid applier.

TV monitor. 

Hug giver.

Kiss stealer.

Tooth puller.

Lesson teacher.

Wet bed changer.

Tear wiper.

Rule enforcer. 

Party planner. 

Toy organizer.

Sibling rivalry referee. 

Tender heart nurturer.

Arts and crafts director. 

Bed time tucker. 

When you think about it like that, being a MOM is cooler than being a rockstar. 

Here's hoping your week is off to a stellar start. 

And if you get a chance, hop on over to my friend Lindsy's blog. 

She's got an awesome adoption t-shirt giveaway going on.

Guaranteed to Impress Your Kiddos

Am I the only ones who hates the stretch of time from after school until dinner? 

My kids fuss more during these two hours of the day than during all the other hours combined. 

But not today. 

Today they played like little angels while I patted myself on the back for remembering this little 'keep 'em busy' trick. 

The best part? I am 90% sure you will have everything you need for this in your kitchen at this very moment. 

Here's what you'll need:

-a small bowl or shallow container

-milk (can even be expired-- win/win)

-food coloring (whatever and as many colors as you'd like)

-toothpicks (or uncooked spaghetti noodle)

-a medicine cup or the cap top of a bottle drink

-some liquid detergent (any brand)

Simply fill the shallow container with milk and wait until it stops moving from having been poured.

 Drop a few drops of food coloring randomly throughout the container. 

Dip the toothpick in the detergent and touch it to the food coloring. 

The results?

The colors literally shoot across the container, making your kiddos oober impressed. 

A magical world of color goodness, guaranteed to both impress your kiddos and give you a few minutes of peace and quiet during the afternoon witching hours. 

Seriously, my girls played with this for THIRTY MINUTES. 

Do you have any idea what I can accomplish in an uninterrupted half hour? 

Try it. 

Love it.

Thank me later. 

Here's hoping your Monday has been fan-freakin'-tastic in every possible way. 

And what do YOU do to keep your kiddos entertained during this time of day? 

Please share your tips and ideas in the comments. 

The mama in me will be oh so grateful.